Barbie (of course) ...

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

. . . dressed as a canadian mountie and sitting astride a massive . . .

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The woman said, "Sir, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea." Churchill replied "madame, if you were my wife, I'd drink it.

...moose (of course)...

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“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

. . . which, in addition to doing an incredible Sinatra impersonation, is also known for his . . .

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The woman said, "Sir, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea." Churchill replied "madame, if you were my wife, I'd drink it.

Elvis (of course) ...

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

...and the way he always fails to pull a rabbit out of his hat, much to the chagrin of his friend the little_ squirrel (of course) and...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

. . . his mentor, Zippy the one-armed magician who taught the young moose everything he knows of life, love, breakfast meats and . . .

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The woman said, "Sir, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea." Churchill replied "madame, if you were my wife, I'd drink it.

... then dashed all the hopes of his young impressionable ward by ...

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

...getting completely off the subject and...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

...seeing where it goes, or if anyone is really even interested, though if they're not I'll be quite disappointed, especially since...

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

...I can't even remember what we were talking about anymore, and so I'd like to start a new topic about...

...the breakdown of narrative conventions in post-modernist literature; but first, you've gotta hear my impression of Cartman from South Park; it's...

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

...really not an impression, it's my natural voice, but that's okay, because women truly "respect my authori-tay" if you know what I mean, because...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

. . . I produced Joe Millionaire, which should have been titled Let's Watch the Goldigger Cry and often use my clout to . . .

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The woman said, "Sir, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea." Churchill replied "madame, if you were my wife, I'd drink it.

...remove the hair that keeps clogging up my bathroom sink, though there's no reason why I couldn't have used...

...telekinesis or nanobots, or any number of small, specially trained...

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

... bacteria expressing the green fluorescent protein (GFP) gene ...

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

. . . and enjoy dining on large clots of gradually rotting biomass, which often resemble White Castle's new menu item The . . .

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The woman said, "Sir, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea." Churchill replied "madame, if you were my wife, I'd drink it.

...grilled babies, with a side order of...

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YEE-HAW!!!!!

... HOOAH ...

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

...the tasty new side-dish made from smokers phlegm, named for the sound of smokers phlegm being expectorated, not to be confused with HUUAGH, the sound of...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

... Spankling, at the peak of ...

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

...Mount Olympia where he is often seen praying to...

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

... LadyJ, the goddess of ...

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

. . . pork rinds, mullets and . . .

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The woman said, "Sir, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea." Churchill replied "madame, if you were my wife, I'd drink it.