...by other Shakespeare impersonators wielding...

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

...obscure words and phrases in flowery Victorian English, until your eyes glaze over and you...

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

... fall down on your back, start vomiting and ...

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And you know what Hell is, folks. It's Andy Gibb, singing 'Shadowdancing' for aeons and aeons...

....making puns like kaufman, such as...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

"I'm vomiting potatoes; I must be a regurgi-tater" ...

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

. . . or "I'm Robert Downey Jr and I'm a Sini-star . . ."

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The woman said, "Sir, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea." Churchill replied "madame, if you were my wife, I'd drink it.

... or the ever popular "Hi, I'm Spankling and I like sticky buns" ...

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

...or this one:

[Click to view comic: 'Butch & kaufman']

which has been proven in labrotory inviornments to make lab rats eargly anticipate their looming death by...

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

...being forced to weave until they collapse from exhaustion...

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

...which reminds me of the one about the weaver, the exhaust pipe and the...

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

...hermaphroditic platypus, a rare Australian mammal that resides in...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

...Northern Europe, which makes you wonder if the fact it's called an "Australian mammal" isn't purely due to...

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

. . . the fact that the scientist who discovered it was totally hammered on Jameson's when he announced the creature and . . .

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The woman said, "Sir, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea." Churchill replied "madame, if you were my wife, I'd drink it.

... he were expecting a baby ...

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

who would later grow up to be

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not_Scyess ate my Sig.

...raised by hermaphroditic platypi until...

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

...goddamn, fucking...

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

...nice...

... at double the price ...

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

. . . of a biggie-sized Double Bacon Classic meal at Wendy's, which is obviously the best . . .

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The woman said, "Sir, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea." Churchill replied "madame, if you were my wife, I'd drink it.

. . . thing to feed an orange gorilla ready to rip off your. . .

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Even Bob Hope is more punk than me.

...trademark finisher, which clearly indicates that...

. . . that you have left your finisher vulnerable to attack, and additional battlements are needed to guard both it and your all-important . . .

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The woman said, "Sir, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea." Churchill replied "madame, if you were my wife, I'd drink it.

... rear from violation by ...

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

...the Rear-Violation Committee, a ruthless yet beaurocratic organization founded by...

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002