I am looking for some advice. I've been given until Friday to fire someone who works for me. He is an okay guy, but not good at his job and has attitude/performance issues. We are letting him go before his 90 day probationary period is up.

I have never fired anyone before. How do you do it somewhat nicely?

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dcomposed:11-06-05: If I was a viking invading your village, you'd be the first to get raped.
Crabby: 10/5/06: i would love to feed you fresh fruit while bathing you.

Singing telegram.

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Batman created by Bob Kane

Make a comic that says he's fired.

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Poop.

Here is the script you must follow:

"Luke, this is an awkward topic to approach, but your performance in the areas of french fry cooking, pickle placement and super-sizing are lacking. We at Fattie Burger Inc. simply cannot afford to waste such a valuable position as Front Office Burger Manager on an unequivocally unproductive dee-dawdler as you.

I wish you success in all your future rapid restaurant server positions and hope you never feel too ashamed with yourself to beg me on bended knee for a reference. Please return your styrofoam cap and nametage, fill out a Job Vacancy Form at HR and clear out your locker by 4:00 p.m. today and no later."

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Ham-fisted ham fisting.

[quote]Here is the script you must follow:

"Luke, this is an awkward topic to approach, but your performance in the areas of french fry cooking, pickle placement and super-sizing are lacking. We at Fattie Burger Inc. simply cannot afford to waste such a valuable position as Front Office Burger Manager on an unequivocally unproductive dee-dawdler as you.

I wish you success in all your future rapid restaurant server positions and hope you never feel too ashamed with yourself to beg me on bended knee for a reference. Please return your styrofoam cap and nametage, fill out a Job Vacancy Form at HR and clear out your locker by 4:00 p.m. today and no later."

[/quote]

"We're firing you because you deep-fried a cash register. You can't really blame us."

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It's grime time.

"I'm.. I'm sorry, we have to let you go. No, it's not the fact that you're gay. No, it's not that you hit on the other employees"
"It is"
"A bit."
"A bit."
"It's mainly that, well, three unexplained murders on your shift, and now the meat in the burger patties tastes funny."

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Think of this as the happiest day of your life. This is Fattie Burger for Christ's sake!

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet