Just decided to post a really old really dirty lymmric and see if anyone else has some doozies rather than the standard nantucket. Post them as comics if you want, text only, just as good.

"There once was a whore from Adore.
Who'd have sex with two men or more.
But her partition split,
and the jism and shit,
rolled out in great lump on the floor.

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At least im still funny .....looking. http://www.carrionfields.com

btw, I do know its Limerick, for whatever reason my changes to the preview didnt take when I spell checked it. *shrug*

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At least im still funny .....looking. http://www.carrionfields.com

There's a lesson in that somewhere.

There once was a man from Madras,
who had two balls made of brass.
When he clanged them together,
there was stormy weather,
and lightning shot out of his ass.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

There once was a man from Stamboul
Who soliloquised thus to his tool:
"You've stolen my wealth,
you've ruined my health,
and now you wont pee, you old fool"

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

there once was a woman from eeling...
who had a peculiar feeling
so she layed on her back
spread wide her crack
and pissed all over the celing

sorry if it's tame, or pointless, but there hasn't been a demand for dirty limmericks since i was a wee little boy... you have the brits to thank for that one, and if eeling isn't spelled right i never saw it written...

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"You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel..." - homer

A woman whose heels were so rounded,
that she fucked 40 sailors we counted,
then blew them in turn,
from the aft to the stern,
leaving the captain astounded.

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

There once was a woman from Kent,
who told me I should get bent.
Thought of whacking her head,
But decided instead,
to bury her in some cement.

It's not really dirty, but I just wrote it and wanted to share.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

[quote]There once was a woman from Kent,
who told me I should get bent.
Thought of whacking her head,
But decided instead,
to bury her in some cement.

It's not really dirty, but I just wrote it and wanted to share.[/quote]

Kent is my last name.

I just wanted to share, too. :)

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I am a delicate fucking flower. https://beacons.ai/jesskent