Atticus  

This actually isn't all that bad... it would be better if only there were a few more people I know.

Hello! My name is Ark! What are you in for?

Well, all I remember is that the big guy said I'd broken about 98.7% of the rules in the bible...

Wow! Harsh!

So what are you in here for?

I said "Oh my God" while not in church.