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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife... You may finger the bride."

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

"hahaha, oh honey. I gave it up plenty of times before we got married. Now you get nothing."

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

"I can smell YOUR BRAIN!!"

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

"Ha ha! Looks like Husband Number Five is still passed out in the punch-bowl! Let's slip off to the coat-room for a quickie."

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

And then, without even using a straw, he sucked her entire face into his mouth.

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

Thanks for the tip Mrs. Scrotney. Have I finger-banged you long enough? I would like to go back out to your limo and finsh poking your daughters.

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

Wife: "Oh yeah, I saw the videotape from your bachelor party, dear, those lips will never touch my body.... Sorry"

Hey, I didn't know Justin Timberlake and Cheri Oteri got married. Good on ya, mate! ;)

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I has a flavor!

"'Ere, just pretend like you're shaking maracas, baby! Give us a kiss!"

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.