I would fuck her 'till she walks funny.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

With a name like "Tripod", I would double-check to make sure she's female first.

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

Lay off her, will ya? Look what you did to poor John Cleese!

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Stupid Tripod.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Jennifer barely survived the attack of rabid fan-boys after wandering past the Star Wars Convention hall on her way to the Halloween party.

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

Natalie Portman in a promotional photo for her new role in 'Jurassic Park 4: Dinosaurs and Hot Lesbians'.

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

By popular demand, the famous statue "The Thinker" was made hotter.

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I has a flavor!

"Oh, I was just picking my back hairs, when suddenly..."

Natalie sez: "Man, those Brazilians are AWESOME when it comes to the bikini area, but they don't know SHIT about waxing the back!"

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

"Now thanks to the wonders of modern science, Portman can satisfy the sexual needs of 8 randy pervy nerdy fanboys at any one time due to her 2 new slits"

You can work out the other 6 for yourselves.

Actually, there are three new slits. :P

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

That's the last time I do it doggy style with Wolverine!

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Love is like oxygen. You can take it up the ass, but it's way better in your mouth.