Is it just me, or does anyone else think we should call DSS?

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I will rate you hard, and unendingly.

Yes, I think it's definitely time...

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

Botticelli's Madonna and Victim.

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What others say about boorite!

Trixie Midtharpe demonstrates the "choking" technique she successfully taught the Ottawa Senators.

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I has a flavor!

Everyone agreed that Thelma had been acting different since the ballistic missile emerged from her head.

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- christ@myself.com - fuck a cat, kill yourself - my alter ego has five stars

When pruning your child, it's best to pinch off rather than shear away excess growth.

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

Some become angry when their child swallows small coins. Some become angry when their child swallows small animals.
People become even more angry when their child doesn't swallow at all.

Tired of practical jokes involving baby shit and butterscotch pudding, Ms Truxillo exercised a little-known ordinance in daycare discipline today, strangling the eight worst behaved children under her supervision.

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Love is like oxygen. You can take it up the ass, but it's way better in your mouth.

"Nah, it just snaps right back on, see?"

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

"...and when you want him to stop crying, you do this."

"And this is about how far his head was in my vagina this morning."

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

"Sometimes I twist their heads off like this. And sometimes I just pop 'em in the microwave and watch 'em blow up. Either way, I just love killin' babies."

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Gina never could figure out exactly why her new method of discipline didn't impress the child protection agency.

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"AthiestDiary, you rock." - MikeyG (I'm LOVED! HOORAH!)

Before she became a baby dominatrix, Marge had no idea that so many babies were into sado-masochism and were willing to pay big money for her services.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Oh, Chicka had her baby already?