1. To you , Top and Bottom means "Mistress/Master and Slave"

2. You live in a city , but actually have a use for rope.

3. You cant watch a horse race without getting an erection when they use the whip.

4. A 50yr old woman in a waterproof coat causes you to instantly fall to your knees.

5. You keep a supply of soiled underwear in your drawers.

6. A nipple ring isnt a fashion statement , its a leash.

7. Youve watched Bound for something other than the lesbian sex scenes.

8. You rate "Tie me up , Tie Me Down" alongside "Citizen Kane".

9. You know who Betty Page and Eric Kroll are.

10. You call yourself "Spankling" on public forums.

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

That woman was 47!

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

Too bad Bettie's turned Christian :\
She was like the dark Marilyn Monroe.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Mr Perm, are you aware of the current Elvishitler-led slagging your getting?

apparently you and I are having gay sex, I only wish you had told me first!

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Dad was flammable