To know which way the wind blows.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

Look out kid, you're gonna get hit:

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

Oh, THAT song, I had it rammed down my throat for weeks when my friend made it his goal to be able to play that song and know all the words off by heart. Every time we got stoned he would pick up the guitar and start singing it, getting bits wrong and retrying.

I ended up learning the words before he did.

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Dad was flammable

Ha ha, my first wife and I used to cover it. We'd play it at normal speed and then double time it until it was like lookoutkidtheykeepitallhidbetterjumpdownthemanholelightyourselfacandle and then we would pass out.

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What others say about boorite!

Is that Vanessa wotserface?

I dunno. Theres some tinkly tinkly piano pop tune going around just now by some chick called Vanessa which im trying to remember the name of so i can download it.

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

I hope that's a joke.

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What others say about boorite!

The pump don't work cause the vandels took the handles.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

Cocksuckers that they are.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

Speaking of weathermen.. grr. I mean, honestly, I take a two week holiday in Florida, and what happens? It rains, everyday for two weeks.. until the day we leave. We didn't need a weatherman - we just knew it was going to cascade water from the skies above for about two hours everyday. GRR.

And what's the point of the damn Weather Channel telling you the 'current conditions'? LOOK OUT YOUR DAMN WINDOW PEOPLE!

This was MatthewEastaugh, venting frustation, in England.

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MatthewEastaugh | He wanders.

You left England just to get rained on? And to think it's been so sunny here of late...

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Absorbed directly through the skin.

Well, we didn't actually go there TO get rained on. It wasn't in the holiday brochures, anyway. We like to think of it as an added bonus.

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MatthewEastaugh | He wanders.

Disclaimer: Actual weather conditions may not resemble those described and/or pictured in the advertising material.

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

[Click to view comic: '...']

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

I went to climb Mt. Blanca in Colorado one August, and it rained every single day, and the peaks were so shrouded in mist that we scarcely got a look at them. Walking in the constant drizzle was very dispiriting, and so our progress wasn't great. By the third morning, we were at what could have been a base camp, but with exactly one dry change of clothes left, we decided to hell with any summit attempt and got off the mountain. We had driven 1200 miles for this.

Then my former hiking pal went up there the following week. Perfect weather.

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What others say about boorite!