ObiJo, get your rapidly diminishing fat ass up here, front and center! Pronto! Um, pleeeeease?

I considered just emailing you to ask about this but I figured someone else might want to know about this stuff, too. I've been looking into the Atkins diet and am very likely to start on it soon. I have a few questions. If you answer them, I might not hurt the bunny.

What phase are you in?

How long did you do the induction phase?

Do you ever cheat on your carb limit and if so how badly does it set you back?

What's your typical daily menu?

Any good tips on what to eat at a fast food joint?

Do you generally follow the Atkins plan to the letter or are there some restrictions you don't worry about (caffeine, nitrates, nutrasweet)?

How difficult is it to find nitrate-free bacon, ham, and sausage (I haven't looked yet)? Is the bacon, ham, and sausage most restaurants have usually nitrate-free or not? If you ask a waiter about it, can they find out or do they just stare blankly at you?

Any regrets about the diet yet?

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

I suppose Red Bull is out of the question?

Posted to avoid the "Yo" joke obviously.

I took one look at the Atkins Diet , and decided "Hey , im not that fat after all"

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

The first rule of the Atkins diet -- you do not talk about the Atkins diet. The carbies may be listening. (They're everywhere.)

I'll go through your questions in order.

[quote]What phase are you in?

How long did you do the induction phase?[/quote]I'm in the induction phase (induction phase = 20 grams of carbs or less a day). I've been on the Atkin's diet for 10 months and been in the induction phase the whole time. Atkins recommends sustaining this phase for people who have a lot of weight to lose.

I don't cheat on the diet on purpose. By that I mean that after 5 or 6 months on the diet I've gotten a feel for what constitutes 20 grams of carbs a day, so I've stopped counting the carbs of what I eat. (Unless it's something I haven't eaten before.)

So I'm sure there are times I've been over on carbs here or there, but the beautiful thing about a low-carb diet is that it's cumulative. If I have 30 carbs today, I'm back on track tomorrow if I only have 10.

The whole thing about the low-carb diet is that you want your body to stay in ketosis. (ketosis is when your body burns your fat for energy) So, if your body's carb limit is 45 for ketosis, then it makes no difference if you eat 44 carbs, 20 carbs, or 1 carb, as long as your body stays in ketosis. The only reason atkins sets the inductive stage at 20 carbs is that it's sufficiently low to ensure ketosis for any body.

It varies greatly, which you'll probably be happy to hear. Today I had cured beef, grape tomatoes, chicken in salsa, cheddar cheese, and a Keto Strawberry Shake. (You will come to love the names Keto and CarboLite - two low-carb food makers.)

I found a place called the Low-Carb Mall that is, glory be, 2 miles away from my house. They sell low-carb ice cream, tortillas, bread, pasta, cereal, candy bars, and just about everything else I had been without on the low-carb diet for the first 6 months or so.

For me, personally, I found my weight loss (averaging around 10 pounds a month) to slow down when eating the low-carb tortillas, bread, and cereal, but am not sure if it was due to those things, or the fact I was taking Zoloft at the time. (Which Atkins says may stimulate glucose production, which is anti-ketosis.) The ice cream, and ESPECIALLY the candy bars have been a godsend. If there's one thing I came to miss on the Atkins diet, it was sweets. But with CarboLite chocolate bars and candy (every kind imaginable), Endulge Bars (an 88 cent candy bar I can buy at Hi-Health here in AZ, not sure if you have them out in MD), and the carbolite and keto shakes (carbolite shakes taste just like normal -- keto shakes are an acquired taste, so you may want to ease yourself into those), my sweet tooth is completely satiated.

That's a tough one. KFC is easy, since you can just peel the breading off the chicken. Boston Market is an Atkins dieter's dream. But as far as a burger joint, best I can think of is to pull the meat off and eat it alone. Pizza place, peel the cheese and meat off and eat it alone. There may be other alternatives, but truth is, I don't go to those places any more. I'll go to a sit down restaurant and order steak or corn beef or seafood. (Anything from the sea has 0 carbs -- non-breaded that is.)

I don't use caffeine at all. This wasn't for the Atkins diet, but due to the fact that caffeine made my heart flutter when I was heavier.

Nutrasweet I don't worry about. Nutrasweet I remember him warning against, but I found that if it takes say 20 bags of nutrasweet (or 20 bags of sweet and low) to make a pitcher of tea sweet, it only takes 4 bags of nutrasweet AND 4 bags of sweet and low. That is, when you mix nutrasweet and sweet and low (or their generics), it takes much less of them to sweeten something.

Nitrates I don't know anything about, so haven't paid any attention to. Could you fill me in on what they are and what he says about them?

Something else I did was quit carbonation. This isn't a main staple of the atkins diet, but I quit carbonation because I originally thought that carbonation was making my heart flutter. When I found out it was caffeine, I started back drinking carbonated drinks and my weight started to plateau. (Which is normal enough in 2 to 3 week stints, but not over a couple of months.) Again this could have been due to the Zoloft, but after reading something about a lady that lost 230 pounds and how one of the things she did was quit carbonation, I decided to quit them again myself. Since then, a friend told me there's been some recent reports suggesting that carbonation stimulates the production of glucose, which again is exactly what ketosis is trying to prevent.

Easy as hell since I don't worry about it. I've lost 100 pounds in 10 months not worrrying about it, so if you find it annoying to check for nitrate-free meat, I'd say screw it and take the meat is meat approach I do.

Not a one. Contrary to what my doctor predicted (and my paramedic brother and nurse sister-in-law), my blood pressure's dropped back down to normal, and my cholesterol's dropped 25 points, with bad cholesterol going down, and good cholesterol going up. (A common occurence for Atkins dieters, though for some reason the medical community seems reluctant to give up their red meat = heart disease opinion, for what I believe to be the correct one, refined carbohydrates = heart disease.) My doctor went as far as calling me the poster child for Atkins.

And all of this without exercising. I plan on starting exercising soon (I will be a master spelunker, rock climber, and metal detector desert-comber geek extraordinairre), but haven't so far and still 10 pounds a month, pretty much like clockwork.

Some random thoughts:

- Some Half and Half milk is low carb (K-mart Superstore's brand is, as well as Trader Joe's - a great store in AZ)

- Stay away from fat free foods. They usually substitue the fat with carbs.

- They have some great 0 carb (sugar free) jello. That plus heavy cream whipcream equals a party in your mouth.

- Sugar free does not equal carb free. If it says sugar free on the front, don't assume that means carb free.

- Watch out for misleading number of servings. Some products may say 1 carb per serving, but then may break down a peanut butter jar (for instance) into 300 servings.

- Effective carbohydrate (EFC) count - you can subtract any dietary fiber, sugar alcohol, (and something else that escapes me right now) carbs from your overall carbohydrate count. Dietary fiber is by far the big one, and encountered very often. So, say a bag of pumpkin seeds has 6 grams of carbs, but 2 of those are dietary fiber, then it's EFC is only 4 carbs, and is all you should count towards your 20 carbs a day.

- If you decide to stay away from carbonation, be forewarned that this really limits your possible beverages. With carbonation, you can have any caffeine-free diet pop out there. Without it, you're basically limited to kool aid, ice tea, and water. Luckily for me, I absolutely love ice tea. I'd rather drink ice tea than eat anything on earth. (Earl Grey and Green Tea are nice changes of pace from the normal blend.)

- Go get your cholesterol tested now. You'll have a lot of people telling your it will go up on the Atikin's diet. For your own peace of mind get it tested now and then in 4 or 5 months after being on the diet for awhile. I got a fin says it drops, but either way, at least you'll know for sure.

- I'm kind of on the wall about Effective Carbohydrates. Part of me thinks that it was part of the reason my weight loss slowed (eating a 72 carbs of tortillas with an EFC of 12 just makes me wonder). But most of the stores support it (though I'm not sure about Atkins himself - a discovery that would probably get me off the fence). Most of the time I'll use the EFC, but if the numbers are really off (eg, a single tortilla had 24 carbs, but 20 of which were dietary fiber, so only 4 effective carbs), I'm usually skeptical and stay away from eating it.

I think that about covers what I know. If I think of anything else, I'll post it, and if you have any other questions, ask away.

(I'll tell you about Prophet Atkins' plan to eliminate the carbies when there aren't so many of them around.)

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

Add another Atkins freak to the mix!

I ended up doing that, too. Whatever it is about carbonation, it just doesn't do a body good.

My friend ran 115 miles a week for a year and ended almost every day with a big bowl of pasta and all he did was keep gaining weight. I've really got no reason to believe exercize makes that big a difference. And the Atkins diet brought both me and him down to 185 or so, and, surprisingly, I'm still losing, even though I I stopped paying attention to what I ate last December. My tastes have just changed, I suppose.

The FDA made really small serving sizes illegal not too long ago, so this one shouldn't be as big a problem in the future.

Yes, it's true. But most of us aren't drinking enough water anyway, so getting rid of carbonation for me was actually replaing carbinated drinks with water. Getting enough water meant I wasn't groggy in the mornings anymore, which was actually the reason I tried to lose weight in the first place.

And furthermore, let's go off in that corner over there and discuss the carbies' elimination...

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AIM: HeeeresWiL | RAAR! TOBOR WILL DEFENSTRATE YOU!

How does Atkins compare to The Zone?

I lost a stack on The Zone (another low-carb, moderate-fat, high-protein diet that nutritionists say is the work of The Devil) but... well, I got lazy. From the sound of it, it is more complicated than Atkins, and a bit harder to stick with as a result.

Bec and I really should give The Zone another try, though...

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Thanks, Obi and Wil.

From atkinscenter.com:

[quote]What are nitrates and why are they bad for you? And where can I find meat/bacon/cold cuts without nitrates?
Nitrates and nitrites are added to meats (such as bacon and cured ham) and smoked fish to produce an appealing color and inhibit growth of germs and poisons. While these chemical compounds are not themselves carcinogens, they can yield byproducts such as nitrosamines, which have been implicated in higher rates of cancer--particularly colon and gastric cancer--in animals. For this reason, we feel it is prudent to limit your intake of foods containing nitrates or nitrites. You can find nitrate-free products in health food stores and some supermarkets. Fortunately, an increasing number of nitrate-free meat products are available in stores or by mail-order including Coleman Beef (800-442-8666). Your local butcher or health food store may also carry nitrate-free products or stock them for you upon request.[/quote]

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

Or you could stop being such a pussy and butcher all your meat yourself. Nothing tastes quite so good as a thick steak from a cow you strangled yourself.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

They told me i was going to get 25 to life for strangling the cow. And all because she said "No , i wont take it greek style on the first date"

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

Alton Brown on Food Network's Good Eats shows how to smoke your own bacon. You have to be pretty limber, though. Ho ho ho!

No, really, the episode was called "Scrap Iron Chef" and here's the recipe.

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What others say about boorite!

Well, I started the Atkins diet yesterday. I have lost 0 pounds. I suppose I'll have to try to be a little more patient.

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

I've started the Dougan diet. You sit around in bed all day and eat junk food, then laugh at those who don't have a naturally fast metabolism.

I hate you, Milkman Andy.

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

You insensitive sack of shite

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

Ha ha, you fat fucks. I have the body of a Greek god!

Wait, Hermaphrodite was a Greek god, right?

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What others say about boorite!

[quote]Ha ha, you fat fucks. I have the body of a Greek god!

Wait, Hermaphrodite was a Greek god, right?[/quote]Even better - two Greek gods!

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Truth be told, I don't know anything about the Zone, other than what you've told me DexX.

It does sound similar to the Atkins diet, except the Atkins diet puts an emphasis singularly on low-carb wheras the Zone concentrates on both low-carb and high-protein.

Something else in the same vein I've heard of is a diet by blood type. It specifically lists the types of foods you should eat and in what quantity by bloodtype. I've heard good things about this, and since for my bloodtype (the most common, O+ I believe) the foods recommended and discouraged basically followed the Atkins' profile, it's possible that the Atkins' diet working for me is just a subset of the larger truth of a bloodtype diet.

That's just speculation, but it's something I meant to mention to wirthling.

How about we talk about it in code right here. (You have your Atkins' decoder ring right?)

The taco owner strode widly past the old lava pit of San Juan.

[encrypted message to user = WiLzzt]They'll be busy trying to decipher that for weeks! While they're off doing that, I'll go cut all their brake lines and then you call them all up and tell them Carbs 'R Us (or whatever the carbies call their eateries) is having an all you can eat refined carbohydrate platter for $2.99! The little pasta-puffing yeast yits won't know what hit them![/encrypted message to user = WiLzzt]

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

In my carefully considered scientific opinion, that theory is a load of hooey.

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

You raise some good points.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

Do you know the requirements of being a nutritionist? You need a mailing address, a name, and some $ for liscence processing. There was a man on the television that brought his cat with him - because his CAT was a liscenced nutritionist! So I hardly consider such people (especially that cat - it was quite fat) qualified to make health-related decisions about my life.

[encrypted message to user = ObiJo]They call their eateries "Chuck-a-Rama" and there they gorge themselves on potatoes and turkey stuffing soaked in orange juice, milk, and corn starch. "This," they say to themselves, "Is fine eating." Actually, I'd prefer just to leave them to their own devices. Who knows, maybe one day they'll come around. I did.[/encrpyed message to user = ObiJo]

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AIM: HeeeresWiL | RAAR! TOBOR WILL DEFENSTRATE YOU!

Let's at least kill wirthling.

No reason to encrypt this one.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

[quote]Let's at least kill wirthling.

No reason to encrypt this one.[/quote]

Can we at least let him finish the comic contest THAT HES BEEN IGNORING FOR TWO DAYS BECAUSE HE CANT COME UP WITH A TEMPLATE FOR THE NEXT MATCH!.

Then kill him.

I dont mind as long i get Bazilla in the next round.

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"