Please.

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Mediocrity at its most average.

He can't pass worth shit and he ain't the greatest skater in the world, but he's got a mean ass slapshot.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

I like to chekov while watching old reruns of Pee Wee's Playhouse. It helps to have a young woman jerk on the chain around my neck every so often.

Thanks for asking. How do you chekov?

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

[Click to view comic: 'Theatre Plotting 101']

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I think my point was well proven, eh, DexX? Now when you say Shakespeare, everyone has an opinion.

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Mediocrity at its most average.

After what Chekhov did, I don't see how Kirk could put him right back on the bridge.

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What others say about boorite!

What was that about Chekov's phaser? If it is used after the second-last ad break, then he has to have charged it up in the first ten minutes of the show?

Wait sorry, I have my Trek terminology wrong - I didn't mention the main deflector dish, did I?

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Chekov is one of the more pointless charecters in Star Trek. He has a horrible russian accent ("Nuclear Wessels"), In Star Trek 2 while all his friends were on vacation he decided to go hang with Paul Winfield and work, he got caught by Khan, and got some weird thingy put in his ear, In Star Trek 4 he got busted by the cops and wound up in the hospital, he's not as cool as Sulu and Sulu has just about as much importance as Chekov... need I go on?

The Cherry Orchard was the fuckin' bomb. Though it could have used more skin.

There. Feel better?

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

You did mean Chekhov, right? But hey, who cares? Why can't we have both?

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

I was basically just trying to prove a point, but this has turned out to be a lot more humorous than I had imagined.

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Mediocrity at its most average.

[Click to view comic: 'Being Pavel Chekov']

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

He's dead.

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

What was the point you were trying to prove? That we're all thick and none of us would know who Chekhov was and we'd all start spewing Star Trek references?

Which of course we did. Because we all knew who Chekhov was and thought it would be funny to pretend we didn't. Plus Star Trek references are a lot funnier than fine literature references. And in our defense, you did spell his name incorrectly.

Hang around a little longer and you'll see the majority of us have a little more depth which peeks out now and then among the swearing and donkey sodomy jokes. Most of us aren't quite as dumb as you might think. Cripes, have you looked at some of the stuff kaufman works on? If you can get more than a few sentences into that page without your eyes glazing over you're smarter than I.

The exception to this is of course wirthling. He is no more than a pissy, pedantic, smirking fuck with an IQ low enough to rank him slightly above a cinder block.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

Looky. I made poopy in my pants!

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

What was the point you were trying to prove? That we're all thick and none of us would know who Chekhov was and we'd all start spewing Star Trek references?

Which of course we did. Because we all knew who Chekhov was and thought it would be funny to pretend we didn't. Plus Star Trek references are a lot funnier than fine literature references. And in our defense, you did spell his name incorrectly.[/quote]To be specific, you spelled it as the tv character, not the Russian playwright.

But fair's fair, tell us your thoughts on Cork, Speck, Mackey, Schott, Uhuru, Zulu and Chagall.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

What was the point you were trying to prove? That we're all thick and none of us would know who Chekhov was and we'd all start spewing Star Trek references? [/quote]

I was not trying to personally attack any of you. That's not what my intentions were. Grrrr... I knew that would be taken the wrong way. I was simply talking to DexX on ICQ about acting and we got on the subject of Shakespeare and I told him that he was overlooking many great playwrights (not in so many words of course)... I was trying to see how many people knew who he was. I never claimed any of you were dense or anything of the sort. I just know many people I know have no clue who the hell he is. Nevermind. There's nothing I can say to save face here.

[quote]And in our defense, you did spell his name incorrectly.
[/quote]

My IQ is directly linked to my shoe size. Neither has grown in the past 5 years. Spelling never was my best subject and I was pretty sure I was spelling it wrong, but I figured everyone would get the idea.

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Mediocrity at its most average.

The reason I know him is that in high school, I was one of the three cast members in our performance of his The Proposal. The most memorable thing about that was the guy who played the father had a bunch of powder in his hair to make it look gray. At one point, he gave himself a "would you look at that!" slap on the side of his head, and this big white cloud floated up over him. I don't recall if we got a good ad-lib line out of that or not.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

He's still dead.

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

Maybe we should notify the family.

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

[quote]
I was not trying to personally attack any of you. That's not what my intentions were. Grrrr... I knew that would be taken the wrong way[/quote]

My apologies. I was being a twit. And I should point out that aside from the fact that he's mentioned in a few sketches off of Monty Python's The Final Rip Off album, I know absolutely nothing about him.

I'm a highbrow poseur.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

I feel bad... I didn't know she was talking about the "real" Chekhov... wait how was I supposed to know!?

i'm a grad student in playwriting. i know a little bit about chekhov.

what i know, i don't like. he was melodramatic. one of my professors said he thought "the seagull" was a comedy, and that "constantin gavrilovich has just shot himself" was the fall-down funniest line ever...

not laughing.

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- christ@myself.com - fuck a cat, kill yourself - my alter ego has five stars

I should also point out that I know he was a playwright, that some of his plays are considered to be quite depressing, and that he made a famous point about plotting, which came to be known as "Chekhov's Gun". I also thought it was spelled with an H, but I wasn't sure, so I didn't want to risk a correction.

Oh, and Chekov-without-an-H on Star Trek had one of the worst fake accents ever heard by human ears. As the PsiCop Bester in Babylon 5, however, he kicks all kinds of arse.

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

[quote]
Oh, and Chekov-without-an-H on Star Trek had one of the worst fake accents ever heard by human ears.[/quote]

Yes, that's what made it great.

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I am a delicate fucking flower. https://beacons.ai/jesskent